It did or it didn't

I was a teenager when I sat in an office across from a woman who questioned me about my life.  She was searching for answers; clues, to find out if there was anything hidden behind what others could see. This was her trade, her occupation, her gift.  It was her job to uncover something that might help my parents understand me. I admit, I was not an effectively communicative teenager but have since wondered, does such a teenager exist? 

I don't find myself not liking people very often.  This woman was an exception.

I didn't like her.

She asked me basic questions about my life...where I went to school, who my friends were, what I liked to do, what I was good at...those were the questions leading up to what she really wanted to know.

I distinctly remember her asking me if I ever used drugs or alcohol. If I had had sex. If anyone had sexually abused me. If I had ever been in a fight at school--(this one was downright laughable).

To each question, I answered:

No.

Never?

No.

Not even once?

No!

Long pause. She jotted down some notes. Then finally looked up at me and said, "I'm going to need you to give me a name of a teacher who I can call so that I confirm that all you've told me is true."

This was humiliating!  Surely, I knew I had never been in a fight at school, that I was often teased because I stayed far away from what most kids were doing in high school, that there was nothing wrong with me, that I wanted nothing more than to get out of her office!  The last thing I wanted was for her to call one of my teachers and ask these questions.  My word meant nothing.  I left her office feeling horrible.

I've thought back on that time and realize now that the reason I felt so awful then was because this woman saw me as someone other than who I knew I was.




Joseph Smith was just a boy of 14 years when he began to question his life.  Like today, there were many different voices and he wanted to know which one was Truth.  How could all of them be right when they contradicted each other?  At 14, he prayed to know which religion he should join.  In 1820, he had a vision where Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ appeared to him and told him not to join any of them.  From that day on, Joseph was instrumental in establishing Christ's church upon the earth once again.

In his own words, Joseph said, "I saw two personages, whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air.  One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other -- This is my Beloved Son, Hear Him!"

As most people know, this started a lot of controversy in the religious world.  Controversy that remains today.  Joseph Smith was hated, persecuted, tortured and eventually, he was unjustly killed. 


I have heard this story my entire life.

Does it seem preposterous that he had seen a vision? Yes it does.  Was I there to witness it?  No, I was not.


Yet, he said it happened. His life is a witness that it did. He went on to be a great leader and the church has grown exponentially since its early beginnings. His life was given in service to the members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  His life was taken by men who conspired against him because they saw him as someone other than who he knew he was.

Here are Joseph's own words in response to the accusations he had to bear:

"Why persecute me for telling the truth?  I have actually seen a vision; and who am I that I can withstand God, or why does the world think to make me deny what I have actually seen?  For I had seen a vision; I knew it, and I could not deny it, neither dared I do it; at least I knew that by so doing I would offend God, and come under condemnation."

This personal example I've shared is nothing compared to the frustration that Joseph Smith must have felt. I tasted a tiny bit of what it felt like to have someone see me as someone I was not; where her doubt was more important than belief; where a need for confirmation from another witness was more important than my word alone.

Put yourself in his shoes. If Joseph did see God, how could he have denied it?  

I do not worship Joseph Smith.  Jesus Christ is the head of the LDS church.  Joseph was a great instrument in restoring truth to the earth.  Because of him, I have many blessings. I will forever be grateful to him; yet he is not, and never will be my God.

Either Joseph saw God the Father and His Son Jesus Christ, or he didn't.

Because I am a Mormon, I believe he did.